Dishonesty vs Emotional Competence

I’ve been having a debate with myself and with some too-honest people who come across as being abrasive: is not sharing true feelings with those you’re supposed to be in some kind of relationship with being dishonest? I decided, yeah, maybe it is, but it’s better than unedited sharing of an honest opinion; people stay around longer, fewer arguments happen, & life is more pleasant. I just read in Carolyn Saarni’s The Development of Emotional Competence that choosing not to express one’s inner emotional state as one’s outer emotional state is emotional maturity – especially when we realize that our expression can have a negative affect on others. I love how life eventually coughs up all the answers. (sometimes too late)

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